this sudden feeling

suddenly I had this feeling. a feeling to just write about something. I'm thinking regret.

we all have our regrets - some for doing things; some for not doing things. well I could say mine is for not doing something. I have to admit, I'm too afraid of the repercussions of doing that thing. what a coward. yes, I know. it's weird, I live through this regret every single day, knowing that it will only get worse. yet again, I know that this regret will die off after an even longer time, after the regret has reached its highest level. but given a chance to remove this regret, I still am not taking it. I seldom regret my actions; I always believe in them. there is always a reason for me to do something, and I believe in that reason. this time there is no good reason. it's just a fear. thus I regret not doing it. it has rendered me incapable of doing so. I don't want to destroy everything, at least let me live in this denial.